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A FFVII Fairytale-slash-crack!ficlet
by SkyFire The Planet (why, yes, I am blaming this one on the Planet) ;P
Once upon a time there was a Remnant named Kadaj who got his ass kicked by Cloud in FFVII:AC. He spent some time after that surfing the Lifestream under the guidance of his adopted Father, Zack, much to the exasperation of Aerith-Mother. Eventually, the Lifestream got tired of one of Sephiroth's Remnants surfing on it and chucked him back out into the world.
But It did not return him as he once was. Having a somewhat warped sense of humor (at least as mere mortals saw it; it could be quite normal for a planet), It decided that since he had been a bit unraveled in the head in his past existence that he should be returned in an... appropriate state.
...And so Kadaj was turned into a 9 1/2" tall amigurumi doll! Surely now he could be of no more threat to the Planet!
Or could he? Little did the Planet know, but the last few Jenova cells on the planet had been a bit of slime on a plant that was then eaten by a sheep. She easily took over the sheep and spread her eeeeeeevil influence all over the world through the sheep's wool...
And then Smelvin the Octopus Jenova! found Kadaj...
And the Planet went *headdesk*....
--
In other words, I... uh... mada a Kadaj. You can't really see it very good in the pictures since he's mostly all black, but he turned out pretty good, I think, and I learned a new stitch while I was making him! Yay! :P
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